In Short
- Most SEO email pitches are scams — they promise first-page Google rankings they have no ability to guarantee.
- Google's algorithm is secret by design — if it could be gamed by an agency, it wouldn't be a very good algorithm.
- Simple maths kills the promise — if 50 plumbers in Camberwell all hire SEO services, they can't all be number one.
- Dodgy SEO tactics get sites penalised — Google actively punishes manipulation, and the ACCC considers guaranteed ranking claims misleading conduct.
- What actually works is straightforward — quality content, proper HTML, fast hosting, real photography, and genuine expertise. I cover the full strategy in my companion article on what actually moves the needle for small business SEO.
The email you've probably received
If you run a business website, you've almost certainly received an email like this: "We've analysed your site and found critical SEO issues. We can get you to page one of Google within 90 days."
I've been building websites since 1992, and I get these emails too — about my own site. They're almost always automated spam, sent to thousands of businesses simultaneously, promising results the sender has no ability to deliver.
The pitch works because the desire is real. Every business owner wants to appear when someone searches for their service. But the gap between that reasonable desire and what most SEO services actually deliver is enormous — and expensive.
A quick history of gaming search engines
To understand why these promises are hollow, it helps to know how we got here.
In the early days of the web, search engines relied on website owners to honestly describe their content through metadata — hidden tags that told crawlers what a page was about. The algorithms were simple, and they trusted the data they were given.
That trust was quickly exploited. As page impressions became a commodity with real monetary value, website authors started stuffing unrelated keywords into their pages. A common trick was stacking popular search terms at the bottom of the page in the same colour as the background — invisible to visitors, but not to search engine crawlers. You may remember how frustrating search results were in the early 2000s, clicking through irrelevant page after irrelevant page.
Google rose to dominance precisely because they solved this problem. Their algorithms got smarter. Instead of just counting keywords, they started analysing context, penalising manipulation, and eventually blacklisting sites that tried to game the system. The keyword stuffers watched their traffic evaporate overnight.
Google's algorithm is secret for a reason
Google does not reveal how their ranking algorithm works, and the reason is obvious: if they did, people would exploit it. That secrecy is the entire point. It's what makes the search results useful.
This is the fundamental contradiction at the heart of most SEO services. They claim to know how to manipulate a system that is specifically designed to resist manipulation — a system maintained by some of the smartest engineers on the planet, updated constantly, and now powered by AI.
Think about it from Google's perspective. When someone searches "plumber Camberwell," Google wants to show the result that best matches what the searcher needs — not the result from whoever paid the most to an SEO agency. Returning the best answer is Google's entire business model. They're extraordinarily good at it, and they're getting better every year.
The maths that kills the promise
Here's the common-sense test I always put to clients who are considering an SEO service.
If there are 50 plumbers in Camberwell, and they all hire SEO services that promise first-page rankings, they can't all be on page one. There are only ten organic spots. The maths doesn't work. Somebody is lying.
The agencies know this. They rely on the fact that most business owners won't think it through, and by the time results don't materialise, they've already been paid.
How dodgy SEO gets you penalised
It gets worse. Many of the tactics these services use don't just fail to help — they actively harm your site.
Google's spam policies are explicit about what gets you penalised: keyword stuffing, link schemes, cloaking, hidden text, and manipulative link building. These are precisely the techniques that cheap SEO services employ. I've seen clients come to me after their rankings plummeted, only to discover their previous SEO agency had built hundreds of spammy backlinks from irrelevant directories — the exact pattern Google punishes.
Google has always cautioned against hiring SEO services that make ranking guarantees. Their own documentation says no one can guarantee a number-one ranking, and that aggressive SEO tactics can get a site removed from their index entirely.
In Australia, the ACCC's guidelines on misleading claims are relevant here too. Promising specific search rankings when you have no control over the algorithm is, at best, misleading conduct.
What's changed since 2017
I first wrote about this topic in 2017, and the situation has actually gotten worse for scam SEO providers — and better for honest businesses.
Google's Helpful Content System, rolled out from 2022 and now baked into their core ranking, explicitly rewards content created for people rather than search engines. Their E-E-A-T framework (Experience, Expertise, Authoritativeness, Trustworthiness) means Google is actively looking for signals of genuine expertise — real experience from real practitioners.
Then there are AI Overviews, Google's AI-generated summaries that now appear above traditional search results for many queries. These pull from sites Google trusts most. No amount of keyword manipulation will get you featured in an AI Overview — only genuinely useful, authoritative content will.
The direction is clear. With every update, Google gets better at identifying quality content and worse at being tricked. The gap between "gaming the algorithm" and "creating something genuinely useful" has never been wider.
What actually works
I cover this in detail in my companion article on practical SEO for small business, but here's the honest summary.
Google is quite open about what they reward. It's not mysterious — it's just hard work:
- Quality, original content — write about what you genuinely know. Answer the questions your customers actually ask. Google's algorithms are now sophisticated enough to recognise authentic expertise.
- Proper HTML structure — semantic headings, descriptive title tags, meaningful meta descriptions. This is basic web design hygiene, not a secret technique.
- Fast, secure hosting — your site should load quickly and run on HTTPS. Both are ranking factors, and both are things your hosting provider should handle.
- Responsive design — Google indexes the mobile version of your site first. If it doesn't work well on phones, your rankings will suffer.
- Real photography — original images signal authenticity. Stock photography signals the opposite. Google's image recognition is sophisticated enough to know the difference.
- Genuine backlinks — when other reputable sites link to yours because your content is useful, that's the strongest ranking signal there is. You can't buy this authentically.
- Google Business Profile — for local businesses, a complete and accurate Google Business listing is more valuable than any SEO package.
None of this requires paying someone to "optimise" your site with secret techniques. It requires building a genuinely good website with genuinely useful content — which is what you should be doing anyway.
How to spot the scam
Not all SEO professionals are scammers. There are legitimate consultants who focus on technical audits, content strategy, and helping you create better content. The difference is easy to spot:
- Scam: unsolicited email promising first-page rankings.
- Legitimate: a consultant who asks about your business goals before mentioning rankings.
- Scam: guarantees specific positions for specific keywords.
- Legitimate: explains that SEO is a long-term strategy with no guaranteed outcomes.
- Scam: won't explain what they're actually doing to your site.
- Legitimate: provides transparent reporting and educates you along the way.
If someone cold-emails you promising page-one rankings, delete it. If they pressure you with urgency — "your competitors are already doing this" — that's a sales tactic, not a strategy.
Spend your money on the website itself
After thirty years building websites, my advice hasn't changed: invest in a quality website with genuine content written by someone who understands your business and your customers. Write copy that speaks to real people, use real photography, keep your site fast and secure, and publish useful content regularly.
That's not a quick fix. It's not a secret. But it's what Google has been telling us to do for over a decade, and it's the only strategy that keeps working as their algorithms get smarter.
If you'd like help building a website that earns its rankings honestly, get in touch. I'd rather spend your budget on something that actually works.
